Establishing Boundaries

It’s important to have boundaries and non-negotiables for ourselves. These are rules or limits that an individual creates to identify reasonable, safe, and permissible ways for others to behave toward them and how they will respond when someone steps past those limits. When these boundaries are not set or enforced it is then that we feel used or mistreated. Learning how to set boundaries and holding people accountable are essentials to living your best life.


Why?

Boundaries are a key factor to an individuals safety. It protects the physical, emotional, and sexual integrity from harm. This prevents the feeling of exploitation and when established encourages empowerment. It allows to understand our values, boosts confidence from within and promote self-love.


Conflicts Setting Boundaries

Those who are starting to set boundaries for the first time tend to set too many boundaries resulting in isolation- this is called detachment. Others who fail to set boundaries or lack of it is called enmeshment. Set the appropriate amount of boundaries to maintain safety and a sense of self.


Creating Boundaries

  1. Clarify boundaries

  2. Clarify consequences. For example: “When you belittle me or disrespect me I will hang up the phone or walk away."

  3. Communicate your boundaries. Let others know what your boundaries are and what the consequences are for violating them.

  4. Follow through. You need to do what you said you would.

Boundaries help us be aware of ourselves and our relationships. They’re important for self-care and making yourself a priority.



 

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